Roller Hockey Preview

Here at the Glory Days News Desk, the new Roller Hockey Season is amongst us.    We sat down with goaltender star of the Devilns Danglers General Rosco Gang Green, to give us a rundown of all the teams and his predictions for the 2011 Spring Season. 

Now, before we start the interview, I would like to inform our readers about the General Rosco Gang Green.  He is know for wearing Green in his wardrobe and has sever anger issues when it comes to sporting events.  He was kicked out of a Phillies game for punching a Mets fan, he was escorted out of his section for choking a Devils fan, and he was told politely to stop revealing his left bottom butt cheeks at a Philadelphia Liberty WNBA game.

So Gang Green what are your predictions for the 2011 Roller Hockey season in Glory Day Sports?

“My team the Devilns Danglers is going to go undefeated and I will even go to the extent that I will not allow a single goal for the entire season.”

That is a bold prediction, shouldn’t you at least wait to see what the competition is before you make such a gutsy assumption.  

“I didn’t play 30years of outdoor hockey, to be timid about my God giving abilities.  I was put on this Earth for two things. One to seduce women with a mean air guitar.   And two to be the greatest outdoor hockey goaltender ever.”

What about the other teams?  For example the Dirty Dragons?

“Why are they dirty?  Are Dragons suppose to be cleanly.  Did they all of sudden forget to wash themselves, and became a ferocious roller hockey team.  Should I be more scared of a dirty dragon, or a regular dragon?  I’m asking. Cause, I don’t know the difference.”

How about the Camel Blues?

 “Is that suppose to be the new brand of Camel Lights.  For one its lame that Camels decided to change the branding of Camel lights to Camel Blues.  But its even lamer to name your roller hockey team after this monumental occasion.  That’s like saying you’re a really big fan of political correctness.”

 I’m going to mention some other teams, and just shut out whatever comes to your mind. 

 Weekend Warriors

 “Do they know that every game is on Tuesday.”

 Irukandi

“Is that Japanese for I suck”

 Motley Crew

“A bunch of guys with long hair, and a sub-pair guitar riffs.  I was more of a Poison fan in my day.”

 Chiefs

“Lacks originality.  Why doesn’t anybody name their team after Rob Lowe’s 80s classic Young Blood.  The day I see a team called the Hamilton Mustangs, I will be a happy man.

 Penalty Box Heroes

“Sounds like a bunch of fat guys, that just want to fight.”

 Shoot to Score

“I thought the objective in hockey, was to shoot to injure your opponent.”

 Natural Lights

“I’ll pass, and go with a Pabst Blue Ribbon”

 Free Agents 1

“They have to be good, since no other team picked up these players.”

 Team Ed Pollart

“Sounds like a respectable team.”

Ok, Thank You General Rosco Gang Green of the Devilins Danglers.  Today is the beginning of the Glory Day Sports Roller Hockey Season, check it periodically with updates and scores.  Or read more in the blog section, for more weekly newsletter updates.